Finding the silver lining

Lately, I've encountered an onslaught of bizarre feedback. Normally, I would dismiss it as one person's perspective, but this is coming from a variety of people, many of whom don't know one another. "For someone who's unemployed, you're upbeat," remarked my father. "Well, I can't let myself fall apart just because my job's gone," was my reply. Some days later, my stepdad commented, "You actually seem happier since you've lost your job." But he's the eternal optimist, full of compliments. The kicker came last night when I was with a group of friends. "I think unemployment is agreeing with you," one stated. "You aren't as grumpy anymore."

Enough's enough. "Yes I am. I'm just as grumpy as I've ever been," came my retort. Everyone in the room sided . . . against me. They pointed out that I seemed more relaxed, better rested, and less stressed. One person came to my rescue, but only to dryly quip that the person who had made the original comment tends to evoke grumpiness from everyone.

I couldn't admit it there, but I've noticed a few changes myself. I now sleep through the night. My blood pressure has dropped 15 points, and a few extra pounds have slid off my frame with no effort. Funny television shows are actually funny.

"Maybe this would be a good time for you to determine what you really want to do," one of my friends said. This seemed like an odd thing for her to say. I'd worked hard to become a counselor. I liked my clients and co-workers, and they seemed to like me. The challenge of each session motivated me to continue learning, most recently about neurology, a fascinating area of exploration. Having no children, I felt that whatever help I could provide my clients, and in turn their families, was my gift to this world.

My job had become my purpose. A purpose I took seriously, and when I lost my job, I felt like a failure. But, as my friends reminded me, I have many talents. Perhaps those skills also deserve a chance to shine. Perhaps I needed to reinvent myself. In the long run, I might decide that losing my job was for the best. And in the short run, my friends, family and cat claim to enjoy my company better.